Q) Is your motive for writing the fivers the same now as it was when you started, or has it changed?

It's changed -- quite a lot, in fact. When I wrote the first couple of parodies back in the summer of 2000, it was just something I was doing on a whim, to amuse the other denizens of Delta Blues' forum during the rerun break. I certainly wasn't planning to do every episode. But the first few were so well-received, not to mention fun to write, that I found myself writing more and more. I first took it on as an unofficial commitment in Voyager's seventh season, and as an official one (with the Trek Nation and SlipstreamWeb) the following year.

But of course the contractual reasons aren't my only ones. Writing parodies keeps my humour-writing skills polished, and those have surprising application in both other writing and conversation. I can use the parodies to air my frustration if the episode is one I didn't like; I can also use them to make points, related or unrelated to the episode. I get a much more consistent amount of feedback now than when I started, thanks to 5MV's forum and those at the other sites that where my new material is published. And there's still the enjoyment factor to consider: it's a bit less than when I started, but it's very much still there.

Q) I notice you got other people doing it too, now. How did that happen?

A couple of months after I started the rather bare-bones original version of 5MV, CaptAnna, one of my friends from Deltachat (the forum I mentioned above) asked if she could try doing a "The Disease" parody in my format. I didn't see any reason to say no. Another Deltachatter, Admiral Sab (yes, ranks are a bit of a theme at DC... that's why my "full" alias is Commodore Zeke), did the next one, and soon I was getting submissions from all sorts of people.

There have been disadvantages to my opening the floor for submissions. I'm constantly receiving parodies for episodes which are already called by other writers, or for shows and genres I don't carry at 5MV. Not all would-be guest writers are easy to work with, either. But outside submissions make up well over half the site's content and are responsible for its rapid growth rate -- and one natural parodist like Kira, Marc, or IJD GAF is worth a year of trouble cases.

Q) How do you get your inspiration? For example, do you take notes during the show?

I do, but they're very sparse. I just jot down a few letters denoting who's in each scene and a word or two if necessary to remind me what the scene was about. If I get a really good idea for a line or scene while I'm watching, I'll note that too. The bulk, however, is done at the keyboard or on paper. I've found getting a day or two or distance from the episode often helps.

As for my inspiration, that comes from so many sources I wouldn't know where to begin. A lot of the jokes are from scratch, but I rarely pass up a chance to make some kind of reference, subtle or otherwise. Anything I'm interested in is likely to show up in a fiver eventually.

But if you're asking what makes me *think* of these things, that would be dementia.

Q) Do you ever get hate mail from people who don't get it? You know, stuff like: "That's not funny, you moron"?

Nowhere near often enough to keep me humble, alas. But it does happen, most often in Trek BBS reply threads. I can't say I like seeing nasty feedback, but I don't resent it -- it's feedback. One of the greatest advantages of the online medium is that makes it easy for readers to tell the author what they think. Of course, I like *constructive* criticism even better: if not for the readers who told me they were tired of the Porthos/chili thing by "Fortunate Son," for example, I'd probably still be running that gag into the ground. I'm not picky, though. It's not like the criticism my parodies dish out is always constructive.

Q) Your fivers are always of consistently high quality - even the guest ones by other authors. How do you do it? What's your formula?

Well, I can't divulge the whole formula, but it involves a Morn action figure and two scoops of mustard-flavoured sherbet. Seriously, my methods aren't particularly precise -- I tend to just throw random ideas around in my head and see what works. Often I'll get some weird impression during the episode ("Hey, this Vulcan sect is kind of like the early Protestant movement") and try it in the parody to see how it plays out. If it works, I keep it; if not, well, sometimes I keep it anyway because I can't think of anything else, but usually I change it.

Can't speak for the other authors. Kira's the only one I've actually *seen* write a fiver (we co-wrote one); like me, she just thinks of stuff as she goes along. It's not the most foolproof method, but sometimes you strike gold.

Q) Spill your guts: how rabid of a Trekkie are you ~really~?

Short answer: All the way, baby.

Long answer: Depends a bit on what you mean by Trekkie. I don't live by the Prime Directive or hop from con to con. I don't own a uniform (though I made a couple for Hallowe'ens as a kid), and I'm only a very minor collector -- my Tuvok and Neelix action figures are enough for me. However, I couldn't be a much bigger fan of the shows themselves. As far as I'm concerned, Trek kicks the skrap out of the *vast* majority of TV, other sf included. That's not to say I don't like other shows; I love B5, Farscape, and the Buffyverse, along with a rare few non-genre series such as The Guardian. But the Star Trek shows, for all the fun I have at their expense, are the cream of the crop.